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Are You Confident Enough to Share?
Can you think of one thing about yourself that you want to work on – something that you believe will make you a better leader, teammate, spouse, partner, or all-around person? If you don’t think there is anything you can improve or develop, this article probably isn’t for you, because it presumes that each of us is on a developmental journey with the intent to be more effective in some way.
If you are still reading, congratulations for believing in continuous personal improvement!
Question – have you told anyone about your development focus?
I’m not asking who might know what your development needs are – I want to know who you have specifically shared your development focus with.
As you might have guessed, the objective of this article is to encourage you to share your development focus with others. For some of you, this may be easy – for others, not so much. How “comfortable in your own skin” would you say you are?
It does take a certain level of confidence to open up yourself to others and show them what’s really inside, especially when you’re telling someone about some aspect of yourself that you want to improve or work on.
Being open about your shortcomings doesn’t demonstrate a lack of confidence – instead, it’s actually a sign of strength.
Sharing your development focus is a win-win for you and for the people you share it with. By sharing, you give others the opportunity to help you advance. The person you share your focus with may have his own experiences, resources, or suggestions to guide you. That person can also serve as a set of eyes to call attention to situations where you can flex your new and improved “behavioral muscles.”
When you share your development needs with others, you also encourage them to intentionally approach their own development. You might spark something that propels them to expand their own development in a certain area.
Showing vulnerability accelerates trust building. Sharing what you’re “working on” does just that. And, when you tell others about your development focus, you increase your own personal accountability. Sometimes, you need that extra “nudge” to make sure your development becomes a top priority in your life. Being on the hook with others may give you just the nudge you need to go forward.
As a leader, sharing your development focus sends several meaningful messages to your organization:
- It’s okay not to have all the answers.
- It’s okay to ask for help from others.
- It’s important to be attuned to how others experience you.
- That you’re human!
Everyone already knows you aren’t perfect, so you might as well let them know what you are trying to improve upon. When you reach out to others to share something personal about yourself, you not only have a chance to build trust in your relationship, but to positively impact the other person’s own personal development journey.
By now, you might be wondering what my development needs are. One of my areas of development focus is to be a better storyteller. My style tends to be more structured and technical, and I think being a better storyteller would make me more effective and engaging in a variety of different situations.
There. I said it. Now I guess I have to start working on this! Let me know how you can help!
Thank you for this article! This article resonated with me and I would love to challenge my staff and I to do this more often. Sometimes as administrators, sharing our areas of improvement feels like “weakness” and this could be taken advantage of. I long to create a culture and environment that everyone is moving toward this goal! We have to build more trust and feel a better sense of safety with each other. It takes maturity and lots of professionalism!
Vulnerability can be very intimidating, especially if the environment isn’t accustomed to it. I love your use of the word culture! That’s what it comes down to. And in order to shift a culture, the first step has to be taken by someone who is confident and brave. Hmmmm. Who could that be? Thanks for sharing your insight!